If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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