this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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