She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize