Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
