omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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