How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
