your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize