Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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