The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
