Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
