I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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