exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
