Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
