I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
