I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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