I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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