i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So squirting runs in the family.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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