She is in my trunk
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
