I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
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Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Come back. Shots need mouths.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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