hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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