I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
that is very illegal...i love you.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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