Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
