I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I just gargled with NyQuil
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Randomize
