Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
