I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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