there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
