Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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