we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
