I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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