We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize