dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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