omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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