I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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