i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.