Texts From Last Night

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  (415): View more from California

  Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99

  (415): View more from California

  Recession joke.

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  (415): Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99 (415): Recession joke. http://tfl.nu/0g53
  Replies (10) Good night (3084) Bad night (717)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again

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  (908): google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again http://tfl.nu/nfnp
  Replies (11) Good night (619) Bad night (2544)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"

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  (786): i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy" http://tfl.nu/v0t3
  Replies (6) Good night (4130) Bad night (935)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.

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  (678): I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back. http://tfl.nu/lb6m
  Replies (2) Good night (2425) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.

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  (406): A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true. http://tfl.nu/azt6
  Replies (5) Good night (2601) Bad night (857)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?

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  (518): Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped? http://tfl.nu/52bj
  Replies (10) Good night (1723) Bad night (960)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.

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  (906): Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work. http://tfl.nu/815e
  Replies (13) Good night (1003) Bad night (2786)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.

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  (+44): You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever. http://tfl.nu/s134
  Replies (12) Good night (773) Bad night (2323)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.

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  (512): Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand. http://tfl.nu/mrxq
  Replies (5) Good night (407) Bad night (811)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob

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  (919): I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob http://tfl.nu/wd4x
  Replies (10) Good night (1801) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall

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  (708): At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall http://tfl.nu/xpwv
  Replies (5) Good night (283) Bad night (750)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much

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  (610): I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much http://tfl.nu/u53w
  Replies (2) Good night (292) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(

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  (406): I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :( http://tfl.nu/1rqk
  Replies (6) Good night (217) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.

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  (270): I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony. http://tfl.nu/dln2
  Replies (1) Good night (450) Bad night (207)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.

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  (847): Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now. http://tfl.nu/76sc
  Replies (7) Good night (266) Bad night (504)

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