You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
