question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
