Even the bartender felt bad for me
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
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Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
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People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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