He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
