..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Did we literally take a cab across the street
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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