They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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