I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
God, I missed his penis.
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