dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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