R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
