its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
