508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize