Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
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