what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
