so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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