Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
