Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
